controlledvariable | exsilium; ic inbox

I'm saying that there's absolutely no comparison between her and Phil. Come on. Have you even heard, like, anything he's done?

[

what is happening]

I have, and I will throw you off this roof if you keep talking crazy.

[SHE'LL DO IT.]

I'm not the one talking crazy, here.

[It's entirely possible that he's trying to rile her up on purpose. Distractions! Yay!]

Beyonce. Psh.

Don't even.

[Don't even, Saul.]

Are you sure you're better? 'Cause I think you might still have a fever. It's the only explanation for why you won't admit how awesome Beyonce is.

[Oh, but he is. He so is.]

I didn't say that. But in the hierarchy of awesome, she's like... [He holds a hand about chest-level, then shakes it. Like he's not even sure she deserves to be up that high.]

No, in the hierarchy of awesome she's all the way at the top.

[Going up on tip toes and holding her hand up as high as she can? You bet.

They're really mature.]

[W o w. Kids these days. Cue the most melodramatic eyeroll Steph has likely ever seen as Saul easily holds his hand above hers without standing on his tip toes.]

Nope.

[He can't hold his hand up higher than hers if she jabs him (gently) in the ribs.]

Yes.

[Oh.

Snap.

She did not just do that.]

Wow. Resorting to physical violence. Real nice. [Muttered, as he oh-so casually reaches for her lifted hand. IF HE CAN'T WIN, NO ONE CAN.]

What can I say? I take after my dad. [Today in jokes that aren't funny!

As she neatly steps back, keeping out of reach.

It's a testament to how twisted up her thoughts are at the moment that the joke barely even registers as being something she probably shouldn't say.]

[Stephanie. Saul's just going to pretend like he didn't hear that, okay? He pouts, pressing a hand to his ribs.]

I could sue you for assault and battery, you know.

We're in an anarchy, Mr. Goodman, you can't sue me for anything.

[Take that.]

You wanna bet?

[Because he's pretty sure that if there's one person here who can figure out how to file a lawsuit in the absence of the law, it's probably him.]

[No don't make it a challenge. That's her one weakness.]

Yup.

[WHATCHA GONNA DO ABOUT IT.]

[His, too. One of. That and betting ~~and like twenty other things, including her~~.]

Yeah? How much?

[There's a moment, amongst the easy banter, where she forgets about all the tension between them and nearly suggests a kiss. Thankfull, her brain catches up with her before her mouth can get her into trouble.]

A hundred marques?

[There was a moment where he was kind of hoping that would be her suggestion.

A hundred marques is pretty good, though.

He smirks, clasps his hands behind his back, and leisurely steps forward.]

I have no witnesses to back me up on this, unfortunately, but gee, your honor, I've got this crick in my neck that just wasn't there before Miss Brown attacked me...

[She watches the little display with obvious amusement, before offering him a lazy shrug.]

You've gotta find a judge first, Saul.

[Also it's weird when he calls her Miss Brown.]

Easy.

[He's walking around her in a wide circle, now, smirk giving way to a toothy grin.]

[That's-- no that shouldn't be allowed.

She's watching him as he circles her, but stays standing exactly where is as some kind of defiance against his smugness.]

They have to be qualified, not just someone dude you grabbed off the street and gave a gavel to.

What, you really think I'd just find some schmuck to play court with me? This is serious business, Miss Brown.

[He turns on his toe, switching directions.]

So what I'm wondering now is who's gonna defend you if I'm the plaintiff?

[She isn't entirely sure what happened, here, but she would like it stop right now because it's a little unnerving.

She licks her lips, pushing wet hair back from her face as she keeps watching him.]

There's that other lawyer here, I'm sure I could convince her to help me out.

[Some... how...

Help.]

Who, Karimov? [He chuckles, shakes his head.] God, she'd love that.

[Also wow is that a terrifying thought: Sonya defending Steph against him. That's nightmare material.]

[Yes? That one. Steph hasn't been paying as much attention to the network as she normally would.]

See, I'm all set. And you're still down a judge.

[Saul has to stop himself, then, because instinct almost has him wonder aloud who might not like Stephanie around here. And that's not playful; that's just malicious.

He stops behind her, head cocked to one side.]

I'll find someone.

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